Wednesday, June 06, 2007

the inevitable conclusion

First, a confession: I don't like to read other people's blogs.

For many people, the bookmarks on their browsers (for Mozilla users, the tabs under the search box) are indicative of their priorities and paranoias. For me, the lineup parallels my "real" life mental activities: google and wikipedia (ego), gmail (communication), NYC subway map and weather (forethought), thesaurus (super-ego), thefacebook (belief in other minds), ebay (id), and this blog (self-justification). My homepage is the New York Times (delusional phobia), so that I seem conscientious when I open my computer in public places. None of my tabs, however, are blogs--not even my friends' blogs, which I do usually get around to reading eventually.

Like any buzzword (is "blog" even a buzzword anymore? Writing that phrase makes me feel like a forty-something columnist for Entertainment Weekly), the meaning of the term shifts: Blogs can be rambling diaries with lengthy entries, they can be collective endeavors, they can harp on a single issue or idea, and they can distill information. The only real qualifier for the medium is the need for a loose motif, either topical or tonal (sounds like I'm describing anti-itch creams). At their best, then, blogs present something that is both additive and coherent, offering a unique perspective, an original concept, or a novel way of organizing/filtering others' perspectives and ideas. ERC, of course, did none of these things (but hey, she did post some funny stuff about her family!).

Setting definitions aside, I'll admit that it seems narcissistic to keep a blog without maintaining an interest in others; if the computer is an analogy for the mind, and the browser corresponds to consciousness (the thoughts whose navigation we control), then my blog-solipsism would seem to translate into utter self-absorption--disinterest in the minds of others paired with an obsession with the workings of my own.

The reasons for writing a blog, however, are different from the reasons for reading one. A few months ago, an anonymous Yalie sent me a letter, asking me why I started ERC (i.e., asking me why I would openly expose my idiocy and megalomania to the ridicule of my ever-judgmental classmates and peers). I responded:
"Putting one's writing on the internet, like the construction of any online presence, is a product of two objectives: A localized, medium-specific utility (for example, the use of thefacebook as an address book or means of tracking birthdays) and a desire for self-representation (the use of thefacebook as a means of manipulating words and images to form a coherent portrayal of the self--an avatar, if you will). Depending on how much Freud you've read, you could attribute different purposes to the latter objective.

I suppose I blog for the same reasons. As someone who wishes to become a writer, having a blog is an impetus to practice my craft on a regular basis and a vehicle for me to hammer out the theoretical ideas that plague my academic work. You could argue that I could keep a diary instead, but writing with an awareness of audience is an entirely different animal. And, as with thefacebook, blogging is a means of self-representation. Obviously, the nature and content of my posts--the self-deprecation, the literary theory, the occasional pictures of myself--reveal both my insecurities and the aspects of my character I wish to project to the public..."
This probably seemed like an affected response, but, in retrospect, it's true: I wrote because I wanted to write, and I wanted other people to read what I was writing. It's pretty simple. And, over the course of my year at Yale, I tried to develop a style and a voice. Strains of thought emerged, sputtered, and evolved: theories of artistic and literary pleasure, a preoccupation with defending the value of postmodernism, an aversion to essentialism, and some ideas of ways to encourage people to read (check out this cool website that serializes books--looks like someone out there in internet-land was listening!) and to enjoy art.

So while I don't think ERC deserves a tab on anyone's browser (unless montages are an integral component of the way you perceive the world), I do think it was an educational (for me) and entertaining (for me) tool of procrastination. But now that college has ended, and I've left the Elm City for good, I'll also be leaving this strange little bundle of my neuroses and interests behind, a time capsule of my final year at a place where I learned a great deal.

My friend Adam likes to remind me of the first time we met, at Yale's freshman orientation, when I complained incessantly about having to study poetry to fulfill the requirements for the English major. While the story is embarrassing, having someone--or something--around who reminds you of how you've changed is also affirming, like a yardstick that shows how far you've come, and how much farther you can grow.

And even if that yardstick is a blog that no one reads anymore, it's still there.

45 comments:

Beneficent Allah said...

Im calling you out: this is a blatant marketing ploy to hype the reunion tour.

Sam Jackson said...

Don't become a writer- BE a writer.

Also, get a feed reader.

Mark B. said...

FYI, Yours is the only blog I have on my Firefox tabs... #18 of 21 situated between NetFlix and TvListings...

Anonymous said...

this is like the six feet under finale.

The Break Up said...

Jay-Z... ERC... Jay-Z... ERC...

I expect the opening line of the "return blog" to be:

"Guess who's back? Uh-huh, uh-huh. I GOT 99 PROBLEMS BUT A BLOG AIN'T ONE! DA GAME NEEDS ME, YO!"

jean-jacques poucel said...

THE postmodern, maybe. Post-structuralism, maybe.

But there is no 'postmodernism'...sorry, that's just a pet peeve of mine.

Anonymous said...

I miss you...

barb michelen said...

Hello I just entered before I have to leave to the airport, it's been very nice to meet you, if you want here is the site I told you about where I type some stuff and make good money (I work from home): here it is

Anonymous said...

You are gorgeous!

Stover said...

The Herald seems to think so, and so do I. Great blog, keep it up.

bernard n. shull said...

hi mate, this is the canadin pharmacy you asked me about: the link

AK said...

The photo: very Thomas Struth. I like.

Re: yardstick, I like the metaphor, but what happens when the yardstick transmutes itself into a meter-stick?

Ian said...

Blimey! I got to read this when you had already left, and stopped, and had said something of yardsticks. Bloody hell, no!!! Come back!!! This was the best thing ever. The style, the content, the wit, the understatement. Please come back.

(And I speak as someone who NEVER reads blogs).

Anonymous said...

buy viagra now viagra doseage viagra jokes viagra patent generic name of viagra non prescription viagra viagra for sale without a prescription buy viagra without prescription side effects of viagra cheap generic viagra viagra online stores purchase viagra viagra women guaranteed cheapest viagra

Anonymous said...

Hello !.
You re, I guess , perhaps curious to know how one can make real money .
There is no initial capital needed You may begin to get income with as small sum of money as 20-100 dollars.

AimTrust is what you thought of all the time
AimTrust incorporates an offshore structure with advanced asset management technologies in production and delivery of pipes for oil and gas.

Its head office is in Panama with affiliates around the world.
Do you want to become really rich in short time?
That`s your chance That`s what you really need!

I feel good, I began to take up real money with the help of this company,
and I invite you to do the same. If it gets down to select a correct companion utilizes your savings in a right way - that`s it!.
I earn US$2,000 per day, and my first deposit was 1 grand only!
It`s easy to join , just click this link http://wavevuqe.freewebsitehosting.com/wakohi.html
and lucky you`re! Let`s take our chance together to get rid of nastiness of the life

Anonymous said...

Good day !.
might , probably curious to know how one can collect a huge starting capital .
There is no initial capital needed You may start earning with as small sum of money as 20-100 dollars.

AimTrust is what you haven`t ever dreamt of such a chance to become rich
The company incorporates an offshore structure with advanced asset management technologies in production and delivery of pipes for oil and gas.

It is based in Panama with affiliates around the world.
Do you want to become really rich in short time?
That`s your choice That`s what you really need!

I feel good, I began to take up income with the help of this company,
and I invite you to do the same. If it gets down to select a proper companion utilizes your money in a right way - that`s it!.
I make 2G daily, and my first deposit was 1 grand only!
It`s easy to start , just click this link http://yhurerajyj.o-f.com/ygepuxa.html
and lucky you`re! Let`s take our chance together to become rich

Anonymous said...

Your blog keeps getting better and better! Your older articles are not as good as newer ones you have a lot more creativity and originality now keep it up!

Anonymous said...

日本av無碼下載日本av短片日本av女優電影0951日本av女優色情影片日本av女優色情圖片日本av女優色情貼圖網日本av女優dvd光碟日本av女優片段日本av女優日本av女論壇日本av女郎日本av免費下載日本av免費影片日本av免費看日本av做愛自拍日本avdvd介紹免費觀賞日本av線上直播日本av絲襪美腿成人av線上色情ava片18禁go2avgo2avcomgo2av線上電影go2av蒼井空go2av免費女女影片go2av免費影片go2av免費影片卡通go2av卡通go2av影片go2av亞洲東洋影片goavgoav2goav小電影gogo2avgotoavhkav片go.2avg02av辣妹曾根av色情av試看

Anonymous said...

I inclination not approve on it. I regard as polite post. Expressly the appellation attracted me to read the unscathed story.

Anonymous said...

Genial dispatch and this post helped me alot in my college assignement. Thank you as your information.

Anonymous said...

Opulently I acquiesce in but I about the list inform should have more info then it has.

Anonymous said...

loved las vegas? attempt the all brand-new [url=http://www.casinolasvegass.com]casino[/url] las vegas at www.casinolasvegass.com with over 75 stylish open [url=http://www.casinolasvegass.com]online casino[/url] games like slots, roulette, baccarat, craps and more and win real money with our $400 free of charge bonus.
we have even better games then the old online [url=http://www.place-a-bet.net/]casino[/url] www.place-a-bet.net!

Anonymous said...

Hello everyone!
I would like to burn a theme at here. There is such a nicey, called HYIP, or High Yield Investment Program. It reminds of financial piramyde, but in rare cases one may happen to meet a company that really pays up to 2% daily not on invested money, but from real profits.

For several years , I make money with the help of these programs.
I'm with no money problems now, but there are heights that must be conquered . I get now up to 2G a day , and I started with funny 500 bucks.
Right now, I managed to catch a guaranteed variant to make a sharp rise . Turn to my web site to get additional info.

http://theinvestblog.com [url=http://theinvestblog.com]Online Investment Blog[/url]

Anonymous said...

Good day, sun shines!
There have been times of hardship when I felt unhappy missing knowledge about opportunities of getting high yields on investments. I was a dump and downright pessimistic person.
I have never thought that there weren't any need in large starting capital.
Nowadays, I'm happy and lucky , I started to get real income.
It gets down to select a proper companion who uses your funds in a right way - that is incorporate it in real business, and shares the profit with me.

You may get interested, if there are such firms? I have to answer the truth, YES, there are. Please be informed of one of them:
http://theinvestblog.com [url=http://theinvestblog.com]Online Investment Blog[/url]

Anonymous said...

Good day, sun shines!
There have were times of hardship when I felt unhappy missing knowledge about opportunities of getting high yields on investments. I was a dump and downright stupid person.
I have never thought that there weren't any need in large starting capital.
Nowadays, I'm happy and lucky , I started take up real income.
It gets down to choose a correct partner who utilizes your funds in a right way - that is incorporate it in real deals, parts and divides the income with me.

You can get interested, if there are such firms? I'm obliged to tell the truth, YES, there are. Please be informed of one of them:
http://theinvestblog.com [url=http://theinvestblog.com]Online Investment Blog[/url]

オテモヤン said...

オナニー
逆援助
SEX
フェラチオ
ソープ
逆援助
出張ホスト
手コキ
おっぱい
フェラチオ
中出し
セックス
デリヘル
包茎
逆援
性欲

Anonymous said...

Amiable brief and this fill someone in on helped me alot in my college assignement. Thank you on your information.

Anonymous said...

Today is my lucky day :)
Apple is giving review copies of iPad to 100 lucky person. Go to http://bit.ly/cmmVr7 and apply for it.

Anonymous said...

[url=http://www.ganar-dinero-ya.com][img]http://www.ganar-dinero-ya.com/ganardinero.jpg[/img][/url]
[b]Necesitas ganar dinero y no sabes que hacer[/b]
Nosotros hemos encontrado la mejor guia en internet de como ganar dinero desde casa. Como nos ha sido de interes para nosotros, tambien les puede ser de utilidad a ustedes. No son unicamente formas de ganar dinero con su pagina web, hay todo tipo de formas de ganar dinero en internet...
[b][url=http://www.ganar-dinero-ya.com][img]http://www.ganar-dinero-ya.com/dinero.jpg[/img][/url]Te recomendamos entrar a [url=http://www.ganar-dinero-ya.com/]Ganar-dinero-ya.com[/url][url=http://www.ganar-dinero-ya.com][img]http://www.ganar-dinero-ya.com/dinero.jpg[/img][/url][/b]

Anonymous said...

Phenomenal site!

Nearly everyone wants to have insurance at one time or another, whether it is
auto insurance, life insurance, health insurance, or homeowners insurance.
These days it is more painless than ever to acquire free insurance quotes from several
businesses in order to find the best deal. You can also discover how to save
a good deal of money in free gasoline when you obtain your insurance price quotes.

[url=http://freeinsurancequoteshq.com]Insurance price quotes[/url]
http://freeinsurancequoteshq.com

[url=http://freeinsurancequoteshq.com/home/compare-house-insurance-for-free.html]Compare house insurance[/url]

http://familytreesoftware.org/family-history-software/

Anonymous said...

Hello, you site is very funny he told me to cheer up .. Merry Christmas.

Anonymous said...

Il semble que vous soyez un expert dans ce domaine, vos remarques sont tres interessantes, merci.

- Daniel

Anonymous said...

The article was very interesting and informative for me. weight loss

Anonymous said...

Woah! Ι'm really enjoying the template/theme of this site. It's simple, yet effectіvе.
A lot of times it's challenging to get that "perfect balance" between user friendliness and appearance. I must say you'νe done a еxcеllent job with this.
In addіtion, the blog lοaԁѕ ѵery fаst fоr me on Ѕafari.
Exceptiοnal Βlog!
Here is my website ... eurovore.com

Anonymous said...

Eхсellent sіtе yοu've got here.. It'ѕ hard to fіnԁ exсellent writing likе yourѕ nowadays.

I hοnеstlу аpρrеciate individuals like you!
Taκe care!!
Feel free to surf my web blog : pikavippii

Anonymous said...

Awesomе article.
Visit my page - Forexbroker.info

Anonymous said...

North Facial area is an outside machines retail keep that offers big selection of [URL=http://www.nfoutletonline.net/#1062]north face outlet online[/URL] and equipments designed for out of doors activities and extreme sports. Their most important office is found in America notably throughout San Leandro, California close to its firm sister enterprise JanSports who was regarded as being the world's biggest [URL=http://www.nfoutletonline.net/#1172]the north face outlet[/URL] maker that provides just about all places while in the U.s.

Anonymous said...

My own favorites is the Jester pack plus the [URL=http://www.northfacetriclimate.org/#560]north face triclimate[/URL] group. The Jester is a easier load up that is definitely genuinely properly suited to carrying college textbooks, but can also be used for short journeys through the wild. The Recon pack is usually a pack that works perfect for brief and medium trips inside woods or even the mountains.It might even be [URL=http://www.northfacetriclimate.org/#814]north face outlet online[/URL] for sleep more than trips in case the weather conditions allows it.

Anonymous said...

top [url=http://www.001casino.com/]free casino bonus[/url] check the latest [url=http://www.realcazinoz.com/]casino online[/url] unshackled no set aside bonus at the chief [url=http://www.baywatchcasino.com/]casino games
[/url].

Anonymous said...

Комплексный Исправление офисов в запорожье.http://poklejka-oboev.at.ua http://vash-remont.ucoz.ua .

Anonymous said...

cheap zlAhLIMj [URL=http://www.cheapdesigner--handbags.weebly.com/ - replica handbag[/URL - to your friends WhQTqzeJ [URL=http://www.cheapdesigner--handbags.weebly.com/ - http://www.cheapdesigner--handbags.weebly.com/ [/URL -

Anonymous said...

Hello I am so glad I found your site, I really found you by accident, while I was searching on Aol for something else, Regardless
I am here now and would just like to say thank you for a remarkable post and a all round enjoyable blog
(I also love the theme/design), I don't have time to read it all at the minute but I have bookmarked it and also included your RSS feeds, so when I have time I will be back to read a great deal more, Please do keep up the awesome work.

My page: cheap computer desks

Anonymous said...

I like this website very much, It's a really nice situation to read and obtain information and also tips.

Here is my blog post: ways to stop smoking

Anonymous said...

Go Hawks and Boola Boola!!

Vigor Cindy said...

The information you share really useful, hope you will share more, I very much like this article. Thank you
----------
https://songlyricsaz.mobi/one-call-away-lyrics-189.html | {auto}
7 Years Lyrics